Sunday, May 21 – Mission to find our tickets to the metal show. Ticketmaster Canada would only allow a pickup option for us American’s ordering tickets, and the venue did not provide a will call window. So we had to go and find a Ticketmaster Ticket Printer or something of the like. Unfortunately I forgot all about that on Saturday, and when I went to look for a location on Sunday morning, all the pickups listed that they were closed on Sunday. Problem. I wasn’t too keen on paying for the tickets twice, so I began a somewhat panicked search for an open pickup window. No one in Canada seems to pick up the phone on Sunday either, so it was looking grim for a while until we finally found a Sunrise Records store that was open. Sigh of relief and all that. So off we went to the mall *shudder* to get the tix. Bacardi made a quick pit stop at the drug store to pickup Red Bull and Pepto-Bismol, then we went on a tasked shopping mission to buy a present for Alg’s kid. We ended up at a pretty cool toy store called Mastermind.

Following that, we stopped in at the LCBO. Let me tell you, Ontario has this booze thing all figured out. I have never been to a nicer liquor store, ever. It was absolutely ginormous, and had several tasting bars. Bacardi and I sampled some randomish $100 bottle of scotch, and then had a taste of several wines. I can only describe the store as elegant–not a term I would normally associate with that type of establishment.

Some more shopping, a quick bite to eat, and then it was time to go our separate ways for a while. Bacardi and Cola chose to stay downtown and watch the Pistons / Cavaliers game at a bar, while the remainder of the crew went back to the hotel for naptime. Much needed naptime. I’ll admit it–I’m old. I need my sleep. If I don’t get it, I become even more angry than normal. Didn’t seem like the best idea for vacation time, hence the nap.

Before I move on to the concert I have to give a little attention to the subplot of the day, the Rockstars show that was going on at the Air Canada Centre the very same night. I don’t think that I will be able to explain the Rockstars show and do it justice, but I’ll try. I’ve gathered that it is a bunch of huge Bollywood stars performing a combination of rock songs as well as routines from their movies. I think. And in Salman Khan’s case, it is done shirtless. In front of about a trillion screaming fans. All morning long, there was a local show pimping it out like crazy, and they were bombarding us with the greatest show promo in history. I would seriously kill for a copy of this promo. It was about five minutes long, had all the Bollywood stars playing air guitar and performing dance routines while wearing black leather, all done overtop of a song that included the lyrics, “Kickin it, like it’s never been done before–here come the ROCKSTARS.” And there was lots of fire everywhere too. Brilliant, I tell you! The best I’ve been able to do is find this promo on YouTube, and the following poster:

The point of this subplot? I don’t know, there really isn’t one. I was just fascinated by this show and a part of me wished that we had know about it beforehand and made it our destination for the night. But we didn’t. Sooo…

Dahlon, Alg and I rendezvoused with Bacardi and Cola at the Toronto Opera house. After a stop into Pizza Pizza that is. Let me tell you something about Pizza Pizza: not good. But there was one on every street corner around there, so we just HAD to try it. Now that we have, we will hopefully never have to eat it ever again. But I digress…So into the club we went. Roses are Red had played already which we had kind of expected, but we got there in plenty of time before Walls of Jericho took the stage. They seemed like nice kids, and I thought it was sweet that the singer was screaming her head off in what appeared to be a shirt purchased at The Limited. Somehow it added to her credibility. They were not exactly my cup of tea, a little too much screaming for my taste, but they were certainly entertaining. Thankfully, Alg had remembered to pick up earplugs at the drug store. My ears are eternally grateful. After their set, the floor thinned out and we were able to pick out a choice spot much closer to the stage. Then, Bullet for my Valentine:

Good stuff. Suitably loud and rambunctious, just what we were after. I should note that it was about this time that we realized it was an “all ages” show, and most of the people around us were under 21. This point was really emphasized when we realized that the girl standing in front of us was about 15 and was wearing a Pokemon backpack. Outstanding. Those kids in Canada start rocking out early in life I guess. Metal show over, Bacardi and Cola grabbed and maneuvered us into the bar they had holed up in that afternoon. I don’t know how long they had been there, but it was long enough to be on a first name basis with the owner and “I’ve been in Canada three days, graduated with a degree in Tourism but want to be a jazz singer” bartender:

We bugged her for several hours, even inventing a drink that we promptly named after her–The Shiley. Soho Lychee mixed with tonic (I think club soda would be better) and a lime. Probably needs a shot of vodka added to give it a kick as the lychee stuff is only 24%, but tasty nonetheless. Finally we left at what time I don’t know, sometime after midnight but before 6am I assume. Back to the hotel for an episode or two of Blind Date and then to bed.

Monday, May 22 – The rest of the vacation was pretty uneventful. Monday we did a little bit more present shopping, had one last decent meal, and then took Bacardi to the airport. After we dropped him off, we continued on and made our way back to the US. Cola took us to a really good Indian restaurant for dinner, then Alg left for home. Dahlon watched some TV off of the laptop while Cola and I watched the Alias series finale, a little basketball, then went to sleep.

Tuesday, May 23 – Dahlon got up in the morning, packed up and left for home. Knee (vacation is over, I guess I can stop referring to him as Cola–for now) had to work, and I had to sleep. I slept until about 11am, spent the rest of the day watching Galactaca 1980 (I had forgotten just how putrid this show was) and eating leftovers from dinner the night before. Knee came home from work, we grabbed a quick bite and then went to see Mission: Impossible III. Even thought the other two films hadn’t been that great, we were both intrigued by the addition of J.J. Abrams and Philip Seymour Hoffman to the mix. I quite enjoyed it, one of the better summer movies I’ve seen in a while. Popcorn flick to be sure, but a pretty darn enjoyable one.

—-

Cliffs Notes: A bunch of guys got together for vacation and had some fun. So there. Flickr pics are here if you didn’t see them before, I’ve added everyone’s photos into the mix to make up for me not having a battery in my camera on Sunday.

Sports related, but an angry rant as well so you might want to give it a read:

Joey Theismann, Canada’s Spokesman

I’ve been back in Chattanooga since Wednesday afternoon and have had a chance to sleep–finally–so I think I’m up to a vacation recap now. By the way, I’m typing this while J103 is doing a remote behind me. Headphones, don’t fail me now!

Wednesday, May 17 – Left Chattanooga at 4pm, connected through Atlanta, finally arrived in Detroit about 10pm or so. Watched about 3 hours of TV between the layovers and flights–the laptop is paying dividends–watched the Grey’s Anatomy finale on the flight from ATL to DTW, then had to suffer through the 50ish-year-old woman sitting next to me that would NOT shut up and had to grill me on the happenings. “I don’t watch that show, but what was going on?” She seriously asked me that. I looked at her and said, “If you don’t watch it, why do you care what happened?” Then she left me alone after that. Glower power! Anyway, Dahlon met me in the baggage claim area, and then we hopped into the Kia minivan that Knee procured.

After that, we stopped in at some bar to grab a quick bite, as I hadn’t eaten since lunch. Dahlon had the misfortune of assuming that we are actually getting bar food, and ordered a veggie platter thinking that it would be made up of deep-fried goodness. Nope. Just cut up raw veggies with some dip. I have never seen anything quite like that at a bar before. After food, we went back to Knee’s and relived our old roommate days of the mid-90s by watching Skinamax for a couple of hours before heading to bed.

Thursday, May 18 – Tiger game day. Got a meandering start to the day, finally made it to the stadium a few minutes before game time. Day game, Businessman’s Special as we in the “biz” call it, and the box office had 1/2 price upper deck tickets. $6 for a major league game. Beautiful. Knee’s friend had already gotten to the game and had found a nice open space in section 115 (NOT in the upper deck), so we made our way there and settled in. Comerica park is nice. Really nice. Especially when compared to the absolute dump that old Tiger Stadium was. Game was pretty good too, exciting finish and a victory for the home team. Weather was decent–sunny for the most part and maybe a bit chilly but no rain.

After the game, it was a trip to Mug & Jug for some Toronto supplies. We had a good Indian dinner (mmmm, Dosai) too. Then back to Knee’s for a little more Skinamax and some sleep.

Friday, May 19 – Alg showed up sometime before 9am, we packed up the Kia, stopped by Enterprise to add him as a driver, then set out for Canada. Stopped for gas in Port Huron (and an Egg McMuffin too) then hit the bridge. Alg, Knee and I all presented our passports / birth certificates to the nice lady in the booth, but Dahlon had only brought his license. The nice lady turned out to be not-so-nice. She gave him a lecture and many stern looks, leading us to believe that he might be spending the weekend right there, before finally letting us pass. Made it to Toronto and eventually (after a wrong turn or two) to the Residence Inn. No sign of D-Piddy so we started to settle in. Someone gave him a call and found out that he was eating somewhere and would be back soon. A few minutes later, he bursts into the room carrying this:

He had Jello shots waiting for us. How thoughtful! They were leaded too–I’m still trying to figure out how in the world he got the gelatin to set up. After a few of those, we went for some food. Had a great dinner of Indian / Chinese food that was super hot and super good. Our server was not very proficient in English, but got the food order OK. Piddy’s drink order, not so much:

“Absolut and Tonic please.”
“Absolut?”
“Vodka Tonic?”
“We don’t have.”
“I saw the blue bottle up front.”
“Oh. Blue?”
“Yes, Blue. Blue and Tonic.”

I think we all knew that it wasn’t going to end well. He ended up with a Labatt Blue. Wow, not even close. I guess all things considered, it could have been worse…Back to the hotel for planning. Piddy found the Absinthe Cafe over in York, I jotted down directions and we set out. We couldn’t have been more lost. We drove all over the place for longer than I care to tell you before abandoning our search. We still have no clue where it is. Finally gave up and decided to stick pretty close to the hotel, as it was raining pretty hard and we didn’t want to try and navigate downtown traffic. Ate dinner, then D-Piddy and Knee (hereafter referred to by their new names, Bacardi and Cola) stuck their heads into Club Paradise, the sketchy looking club across from the hotel. We got the OK and stepped in. Big club with a ticket booth, bar area, and big dance floor area. Completely deserted. There were about 8 Jamaican guys playing dominoes and that was it. Our bartender, Miss Cleo (yes, I did make that up) said that Saturday night they would be bursting at the seams. Yeah. OK lady. Had a beer, played some pool, went to bed.

Saturday, May 20 – Massive and completely decent breakfast at the Residence Inn. Eggs, sausage, waffles, fruit, oatmeal, bagels, toast, potatoes, etc. I’ve paid for breakfasts that were much worse. It was “kick around downtown” day. The Distillery District was the first stop. Nice little shopping area, some art galleries and neat little shops and restaurants. They were prepping for a Jazz Festival later that day. St. Lawrence Market was the next stop. I got some Apple Cider and a Pastrami sandwich, so I was as happy as I get. Great farmers market that I could have spent a lot of time at. Art Gallery of Ontario was next. Disappointing. They are doing a lot of construction there, so much of the museum was closed off. Nothing head turning that is for sure. After that, the Museum of Contemporary Canadian Art. This was more my speed. One really cool exhibit with metal wire work and doll heads. And the “All-Seeing Eye”:

They also featured a photo exhibit that was a little heavy handed in its environmental message. But the pics were cool. Walked around and window shopped for a little longer before returning to the hotel for naps. Cola picked the eats that night, Thai Basil on Bloor St. Unbelievable. One of the best kind of fancy but not too expensive meals I’ve had in a long time. Great food and funky cocktails that we all enjoyed. Check out the PDF menu on their site if you want to be tantalized. Bar hopping after that. Irish pub with live music that would have been great if they volume would have been cut in half. Walking and window shopping before settling on (my choice, sorry guys) what we later found out was the gayest non-gay bar in Toronto. It was moderately quiet, which appealed to me. A guy we dubbed Liberace was rocking out to what we can only assume were his choices on the jukebox, as well as eying Bacardi up and down. The bartender / owner then came over and told us that some guy that was just like David Blaine was up front and she was going to send him back to “entertain” us. I looked at the rest of the fellas and said, “drink fast.” That was about it for us and we went back to the hotel for the night. Except for Bacardi and Cola who were hellbent on going to Club Paradise again. When we turned into the road by the hotel, we were greeted by the sight of about a billion cars parked outside the club. Miss Cleo had not been exaggerating when she said they would be busy. Alg, Dahlon and I turned in while Bacardi and Cola tried to get into the club. I guess that the club wouldn’t let them, probably because they weren’t Jamaican, so instead they hung out in the common room at the Residence Inn and chatted up a couple of guys that were living there.

Bacardi and Cola knocked on my door about 2:45am. I ignored them. They continued knocking so I finally gave up and got the door. “Dude, we’ve got meat pies.” It seems that they had visited the Jamaican cafeteria truck that was parked outside of Club Paradise. I got out of bed and we went to their room where they regaled me with the tales of their evening. “We’ve got to hurry and eat, because the guys downstairs said we had to go back down to the club when they close because that is when all of the action spills out into the parking lot.” They then told me about Ding Dong. Who is Ding Dong? We still aren’t quite sure. According to the front desk lady at the Residence Inn Airport Toronto, he is Jamaica’s greatest dancer and entertainer. And he was in town to judge the Short Shorts contest at Club Paradise on Monday. Ding Dong became the main topic of the rest of the trip, becoming the stuff of legends. Bacardi and Cola made their way back to the club, and after I finally went back to bed at about 4am, hoping they wouldn’t knock on the door again. You’ll have to ask them what they did the rest of the night.

I’ll post the rest of the trip highlights later this weekend–keep watching this spot.

I’ve added the remaining pictures from the Toronto vacation to the Flickr photo set. I’ll be working on a summary report over the weekend assuming I can remember what happened.

Seacrest Blames Busy Schedule for Hatcher Split

It was nice of him to not blame her disgustingly ugly face and skeletal frame.

Downtown time today. There are a few pics up here. I’ve integrated all of the pics into one Flickr set called Toronto, so you will just have to scroll through and see what is new.

Packed up the morning and got on the road about 8:30am. Dahlon didn’t bring his Birth Certificate, and there was a short period of time where we were not sure that the lady was going to let him across the border. She let him off with a frown and a stern lecture, so now we are here. Currently, we are having a little siesta at the hotel, and will head downtown to investigate things later tonight.

Pics from today…so far.

*update*

Last night’s mission: find the Absinthe Pub to find out where to try out some fake stuff and to find out how to procure some real absinthe. Last night’s mission? A complete and total failure. We drove around the York area for way too long and never did find it. It was raining like a crazy man too, so after we made the decision to abort it was too late to head for downtown. Result? We ended up at Kelsey’s–Canada’s TGI Fridays. Not where we wanted to end up, but it served its purpose. I have to say it was actually pretty good grub, better than average chain restaurant fare to be sure.

We are heading downtown this morning, hopefully today will be more successful.

I’m in Detroit. Here is my Flickr set from the day:

Pre-Toronto

We went to a Tiger game and bought $6 upper-deck tickets, then sat in section 115 down the right field line. A bargain.

Good times. We are leaving for Toronto in the morning. Hopefully, the Kia that Knee rented won’t fall apart on the trip.

The vacation countdown is on. Only one day left, I leave for the airport tomorrow afternoon.

I’m bringing my camera and my laptop, so it isn’t out of the question that I will post a couple of times during the week. Possibly with photographic evidence of vacation shenanigans. So far the only planned activity is a Sunday night “rock show” at the Toronto Opera House:

Bullet For My Valentine
Walls of Jericho
Roses are Red

I’m an old man now, so I’ll be stopping in at a Toronto drug store to buy some earplugs. Rock on!

I stewed about this story for a little while to let my thought settle. I hope that means that some of the following will make sense:

Bush says U.S. not ‘trolling through personal lives’

The privacy of ordinary Americans is fiercely protected in all our activities.

No. It isn’t. You know a good way to protect privacy? By NOT illegally gathering and creating a hugungous database of phone calls from the citizens of this supposedly free country. That would be a start.

I’m angered and outraged by so many facets of this story. We have known that the NSA was conducting wiretaps and collecting phone conversations from “international calls” for quite some time. The EFF filed suit against AT&T in January for cooperating with the NSA. The New York Times reported on it in December of last year. I guess the fact that they are building a database of all calls and not just “suspicious” ones is the new information. Whatever. Suspicious calls, random calls, all calls–it is all crap.

I’m angry that we as citizens let the issue drop in the first place. The idea that it is OK to violate the privacy of a citizen sometimes just doesn’t sit very well with me. I’m not OK with our government making the decision as to who is suspicious and who isn’t. I’m angry that the Telco corporations willingly participated. I’m angry that our government is currently working under the assumption that they are above the laws set forth in the Constitution. And I’m angry that we are letting them.

I’d love to be extra indignant toward the Telcos, but do we seriously expect these companies to try and PROTECT us? These are the same idiots that are trying desperately to be in bed with everyone in Washington so that they can get legislation passed to protect them from having to innovate or change or compete. AT&T contributed $1 million to Rep. Bobby Rush’s pet project. How generous and thoughtful of them. What’s that you say? Rep. Bobby Rush has been a member of the Energy and Commerce panel for more than a decade and serves on its subcommittee on Telecommunications and the Internet? Oh. That seems more like, what, bribery? Let me tell you though, Qwest comes out of this smelling like a ROSE!

We have a right to privacy in this country. It is a right protected by the Constitution. But the current government–and I mean ALL of the government–has no interest in protecting that Constitution. So we are left with things like a giant database that treats all Americans like criminals.

Nice. Maybe I’ll just stay up in Canada when I get there next week. Huh? They pay HOW MUCH in income tax?!? Oh. U-S-A, U-S-A, U-S-A!!!

*update*
About that EFF lawsuit…

DOJ Moves to Dismiss AT&T Class Action under Cover of Night

Apparently, the DOJ is claiming that this wiretapping is a “state secret” and has filed a motion to dismiss the lawsuit. Anyone out there still feel like everything is hunky dory? Me neither.

I know things have been newsy the last few days, but I couldn’t resist this story:

6 Arrested in Boston Big Dig Investigation

It seems that the largest concrete supplier for Boston’s Big Dig project allegedly falsified records that covered up the fact that they were delivering substandard concrete. I reiterate: they built a 3 mile long tunnel underneath a city, and they built it with inferior concrete. Not a good idea. I know that leaks have already started cropping up in the tunnel beginning a couple of years ago, and now with the revelation of the inferior concrete…it doesn’t look good. I don’t know about you, but I’m not very comfortable with the idea of driving underneath a city in a tunnel made from crap material. Just seems like a bad idea.

Go and buy the Gnarls Barkley CD. Best CD of the year. By far. No contest. It really is that good.

It is comforting to know that the reason I didn’t like Cee-Lo as much as I should all these years is that he just didn’t have the right beats behind him. Now he does. Danger Mouse is on quite a roll, what with the Gorillaz CD and now this one. He definitely has my attention and I look forward to whatever is next for him. Plus, even if the music sucked, they still took a bunch of cool promo photos:

Installed a peephole in the front door. Now I know who I’m going to yell at before I open it. This should really help me be more prepared.

Vacation. A foreign concept to me for about the last decade or so. I seriously haven’t had a full blown week long vacation in so long I can’t remember. That is about to change.

I’m leaving May 17th for Detroit, with an ultimate destination of…Toronto. Yup, we are taking it international folks. It was originally a passing comment made to my Cincinnati compatriot, Knee. He lives in Detroit, and we talked about me flying up there and then taking a bit of a road trip over the border. He heartily endorsed the idea, and then I mentioned it to Alg. He seemed agreeable to the idea as well, so we opened up the trip and now have a grand total of five. Dahlone and D-Piddy make up the rest of the crew. Basically, a bunch of us old high school cronies taking a little destination vacation sans kids and wives. Oh yeah.

The plan outline involves me and Dahlone arriving in Detroit on Wednesday. Thursday Knee is taking the two of us to Comerica Park to see an afternoon Tiger game. Alg meets us Friday morning, and we head over to Enterprise to rent ourselves a minivan. Yup, a minivan. We are gonna do this vacation family style–at least with regards to transportation. D-Piddy flies into Toronto and we meet up with him after our drive across Ontario. Well, the tiny part of Ontario between Detroit and Toronto anyway. Lodging will be provided by the Airport Residence Inn, where we will occasionally stop in to shower and have a nap over the weekend. Friday, Saturday, and Sunday we have no plans. Nothing. We are just going to see whatever the hell we want to see. Monday, Piddy heads back to the airport and the rest of us pile back into the van for a return trip. I’ll stick around Detroit until the 24th, and then back to Chattanooga and the work week grind.

I’m eagerly anticipating this trip, and the countdown is on. Ten days. Oh yeah.

Things I saw on my commute to work today:

• A woman driving a Ford Explorer applying makeup at a red light. In the right hand lane of the road.
• Said woman then making a LEFT HAND TURN when the light turned green. Then continuing to apply makeup as she weaved her way down the road.
• Another lady driving 30 in a 40mph zone. For 2 miles.
• A Ford Excursion stopped at a red light. IN FRONT of the stop line. The Excursion is a whopper of a vehicle, so as you might imagine that car being in front of the stop line meant that it was sticking halfway out into the intersection.
• Two cars with jumper cables strung between them. At the same intersection. Would it KILL you guys to push that car into a parking lot or something?
• Two cars exiting the Central Park and accelerating from the drive thru window all the way through their turn onto the road, without stopping at the exit. Right in front of me. A thank you goes out to my brakes.

I have a 10 minute drive into work everyday. There is no reason on earth that I should be able to witness half a dozen traffic related crimes against nature in that space of time. And yet, I’ll bet I could come up with a list similar to this EVERY MORNING.

Tennessee, there is a little thing called Drivers Education that you might want to consider making a mandatory step in the process of gaining a Drivers License. I know you have an aversion to anything with the term “education” in it, but still.

Maybe I’m just a vindictive sort, (maybe?!?) but I am glad that Zacarias Moussaoui will not be put to death. Put him in the darkest corner of the loneliest prison and leave him there to rot. Better yet, leave him there to rot and NEVER, EVER allow his face to be shown again. I don’t want him to turn into some Charlie Manson character who continually shows up and is allowed his face time to blather on about whatever it is rolling around in his brain that day. I don’t want “Dateline” to have an “exclusive” interview with him in a year. I want him completely removed from society, never to be seen again.

It would also be cool if they subjected him to round the clock screenings of Thelma and Louise, but that might be construed as “cruel and unusual” punishment.

Sometimes when there is no one else to be angry at, you have to look inward. Like when I leave my laptop mouse at a customer’s site, and have to go back out there to pick it up. Assuming that no one has walked off with it yet.

I’m an idiot. Grrr.

Nicholas Burns says that the U.N. will order Iran to stop their nuclear program.

I’m sure that is going to work. How many seconds exactly do you think it will take before Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad responds with, “No. Bugger off.”

I’m guessing two.

Whew, I’m still trying to catch my breath a bit after my marathon blogging sessions over the weekend. 40 posts in two days, all recorded as I watched the 17 hours of draft coverage on ESPN. I blogged the hell out of that Draft!

Bye Mel Kiper Jr., it’s been great spending time with you and I’ll see you again next year. It was a good year, the Jets didn’t even do anything stupid that I’m mad about. It’s a Draft Day Miracle.

Now back to being mad at stuff…