I went down to do a wiring job with a coworker this morning. This is a job that the customer said was a “get done whenever you feel like it” job, but has been hanging for a couple of weeks now. We have tried to complete the job on at least one other occasion, but were instead put to another task. Finally this morning, the boss told us to head down there and finish up. After a 20 minute drive downtown we find the business closed and the gate locked.

My initial thoughts are that:

• we are never going to get this job done
• we probably should have called ahead to verify that this wasn’t a vacation day for them
• this wasn’t the most efficient morning I’ve ever had
• it was better than being in the office working
• I wish we had left an hour later so we could have gotten lunch at Lupi’s

Am I surprised that forty-nine people have been indicted in a scam to pocket Red Cross hurricane relief funds with more indictments expected? No.

Should these people be surprised that I wish upon them the most horrific pain and trauma imaginable? No.

A flesh eating bacteria? Sounds good. A run-in with a bear trap? Fine by me. Spontaneous compound fractures of every bone in their bodies? Even better. When “people” do things like this, I figure that they have turned in their human card and deserve whatever bad thing comes along. I just hope that the universe has something juicy cooked up for them.

I tried to call the stupid Public Works office just now. I got the following recorded message:

“Our hours are 8am to 4pm Monday through Friday. Please call back during normal business hours.”

It is 3:30pm on a Tuesday. My conclusion? The Public Works office is filled with lazy employees who lie.

I upgraded to WordPress 2.0 last night. There are no cosmetic changes, so the angryb.com look that you all know and love will not change. Most all of the upgrades are behind the scenes in the admin pages and will hopefully make my life easier.

So far as I can tell, everything went smoothly and without incident–which in my experience is rare for an upgrade. Please email me if you find something acting funny or not working in the next week or so.

angryblogo+bugs@gmail.com

This limb might not look all that big, but let me tell you–that when it falls onto the roof at 6-something AM, it makes a big scary noise! This happened yesterday on Christmas, and I cannot remember the last time I was so quickly awakened from a sound sleep. Which was annoying especially since I was trying to sleep in a bit and after the big crash, I was unable to go back to sleep. My heart was pounding in a manner I can only assume to be similar to the result of Pulp Fiction-style adrenaline shot to the chest. It was still dark outside and also raining, so I didn’t investigate until later that morning. I was very glad to see that no damage had been done, though now I have to get up on the roof and clear off the debris.

And to think I wanted a yard with trees. I’m a damn fool.

Steven Spielberg’s War of the Worlds:

*Yawn*

Why oh why does every utility company have a different due date for payment? Here are the due dates for some of my utilities:

• Cable – 30th
• Water – 6th
• Power – 31st
• Car Insurance – 23rd
• Mortgage – 1st

Not to mention, all of the bills trickle in all throughout the month, and I often get my cable bill about 5 days before it is due. Would it really be so hard to have a standardized due date and a standardized time for sending out bills? I have to sit down and pay bills at least twice a month because I can never seem to get the timing down to have all the bills in hand and pay them all at once while still beating all the due by dates. And it makes me furious every single time.

This doesn’t even address my anger at the utility companies for being inept and impossible to deal with. Another time, another time.

For the Bookish among you (via Lifehacker.com):

DIY paper-corner bookmark thingies.

Best thing I’ve seen on SNL since…well, since the last time Chris Parnell rapped.

Video N/A

This video shows the following things to be true:
Mr. Pibb + Red Vines = Crazy Delicious
Chris Parnell + Rap = Crazy Funny

*update*
Lazy Sunday is now free from iTunes.

*update #2*
NBC has contacted YouTube and told them to remove the video. Asses.

We had our company Christmas dinner last night at the Mandarin Garden. And what did I find when I opened my fortune cookie?

I think that this particular fortune making its way into my hands might be considered slightly ironic.

I’m mad that stupid LaDainian Tomlinson sat out most of the last quarter while Michael Turner ran 83 yards for a touchdown. I’m mad that years of Jake Plummer inconsistency and lunacy caused me to sit him and his 18.13 points on the bench. And I’m mad that my 12-2 regular season has gone down the toilet.

Stupid Fantasy Football.

I set out for Cafe Mi Aroma last night to watch the taping of an episode of Chattanooga The Show. Well, I mostly went to see Jennifer Daniels. But getting to watch a locally produced television show / train wreck was just bonus material.

Let me preface what follows by saying that I’m sure everyone involved in the show is a wonderful human being. They probably rescue kittens out of trees and pay their taxes early and always use their turn signal and help old ladies across the street.

The show blows. It is a show dedicated to the happenings in Chattanooga. Problem? There are no happenings in Chattanooga. The first segment was a *cough* “live” interview with Dave Ramsey. Or a pre-recorded video of Dave’s answers to questions that they are going to try and play off as live. Segment #2 was a sit down with Jennifer. She came off pretty well, though listening to her and the host try and come up with an explanation for podcast did cause me some pain. Listening to her sweetly try and explain what a great place is it for musical artists made me want to vomit. There are hardly any musical venues here in town, and the few they do have are pretty much set with a rotating list of the same yokels. And I can’t blame anyone but the residents of Chattanooga as music events are almost always very poorly attended. My favorite local-y artist Jodie Manross is forever downtrodden that she can’t find anyone in town who will let her play. But anyway…back to the show! Segment #3 was a gadget guide from some wonderful people from the local Best Buy. By wonderful I mean ignorant and possibly borderline retarded. I stopped counting the number of times the female used the word “actually” after about 72. She also informed everyone that you cannot listen to a podcast on a normal MP3 player. An aside–the show will be available online for your viewing pleasure. I haven’t seen the finished product yet, but it wouldn’t surprise me to hear a loud crashing sound after this statement. That noise would be me repeatedly bashing my head against the table in frustration. The last segment was a performance from Jennifer, which unlike the rest of the show I feel no need to criticize.

I sat at my table with my earbuds firmly inserted and my iPod volume turned up throughout most of the show. Whenever I tried to pay attention to the proceedings, it caused me pain. The best thing to come out of the evening was a good cup of coffee, a signed CD, and my ability to get through a big chunk of Helter Skelter, my current emergency paperback that I keep in my messenger bag to help get me through situations like this.

Allow me to reproduce an email I sent to Coinstar customer service yesterday:

Transaction #—–
Store #14500335
Bi-Lo
6951 Lee Highway
Chattanooga, TN 37421

I dropped $69.55 into your machine with the intent to get an Amazon gift certificate with no processing fee. After making my selection, the machine took all my money, sat idle for several minutes “processing” or some other similar term, then said it was having technical difficulties and left me with only the option for a cash-out minus the processing fees. No “go back”, no “try again”, no other choice.

I lost $6.19 per your fee extraction. Had I been warned that the Amazon option wasn’t functioning at the time, I would have either waited or gone to another location. I am VERY displeased that there was no other option but to give you my percentage and get the cash.

I look forward to receiving some sort of response or restitution.

Needless to say, this experience left me quite irritated and unimpressed with Coinstar. However, to their credit, I received an email back from them about five hours later apologizing for any inconvenience along with an Amazon.com gift certificate code for the amount I had paid in processing fees.

Moral of the story? If you use the Coinstar machines looking for a gift certificate and it forces you to cash-out instead, make sure you write down all the pertinent information from your ticket so you can email Coinstar and be reimbursed for the fees.

Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has this to say about the Jews and the Holocaust:

“They have invented a myth that Jews were massacred and place this above God, religions and the prophets”

Oh boy, this is gonna end well…

I’m soliciting submissions for an Angry B logo. I’m not a good artist, so here is hoping that some persons in my audience are. I have in mind something simple, an outlined or caricatured angry face maybe? Simpler the better, as I would like to be able to reproduce it as my favicon, site logo, and maybe start up a cafepress shop for apparel.

Please submit images to: angryblogo@gmail.com

If someone submits something I like, they win–something. I’ve got lots of boxes filled with crap–I mean treasures–out in the garage. Credit will be given to the artist, but rights will be mine, all MINE!

Noodling. Legitimate sport, or a grand trick to get ladies all wet? I know nothing gets me going quite like watching a lady wrestle a 40-pound catfish. Yowza. Check out the hot video action here in a clip from the DVD.

I’m sure my hobbies seem silly to these devoted “Noodlers” and maybe I shouldn’t poke fun. But I just can’t help it–this is just some ridiculous nonsense.

I’m jealous of all you Northerners, Mid-westerners and Easterners that are getting snowed on. Watching a snowstorm is one of those simple pleasures in life that I miss about the north. I have to watch CNN or the Weather Channel to try and get my fix. Kids, I implore you–don’t miss this opportunity to sit and watch it fall. Don’t think about shoveling or getting to work or going out. It’s nearly the weekend, so no worries there. Just sit and watch it fall. Sit and listen to it fall. Man, I’m feeling downright tranquil just thinking about it. So enjoy your storm and think of ol’ Angry B, stuck in Tennessee with no snow to call his own.

You bastards.

(Photo taken from from user adamwebb at Flickr.com)

Why do people insist on talking to me in the morning?

I stopped by the grocery store on the trip into work today because I had used the last of the coffee yesterday. Picked up a few things and headed for the checkout. There was not a soul there. One line had a light on, but no one there. So I walked down the the customer service (yeah right) desk, and the lady there told me to go down to the lane with the light. That had no one there. I explained this to her, but instead of rolling her eyes and ringing me up herself, she flagged down the old lady that was supposed to be at her register and sent me away. Sooooo, I head back to checkout #6 so I can buy my coffee and get out of there. Unfortunately, this checkout lady likes to talk. To me, to her 90-year old bagboy, to herself, to inanimate objects, etc. Did I mention she was old? Well, she is. And SLOW too. And between her muttering and my half-asleep daze, I can’t understand half of what she said. She finished running my items through, and then starts muttering. After I realize she is muttering at me, I finally deduce that she wants me to pull my receipt out of the printer. I don’t know if she doesn’t have the strength to make the paper tear or what, but that was her demand / request. Then she had to start rattling away about how I must still be asleep and she wasn’t going to say anything about it but then I didn’t answer her when she talked and I must be sleepy and she gets up at xx-o’clock and blah blah. Lady, you SAW the coffee you ran through the scanner right? In it’s unbrewed form? Which indicates that I have yet to ingest any of it, right? Shut UP!

I hate people even more than usual in the mornings.

Originally discussed here.

I still contend that Teri Hatcher is not an attractive woman. And the evidence supporting my assertion is really starting to pile up:

My Christmas charity for the past few years and again this year is Child’s Play.

If you are a gamer or even an occasional softie like me, you might want to consider it yourself. Be sure to read the FAQ for the history of the charity. It is pretty interesting how a couple of guys trying to prove the “gamers are bad” people wrong turned into such a big deal for these kids.

Me stumping for a cause may seem a bit hypocritical after this entry, but I ask you to closely examine the banner above as well as the one in the sidebar. Nope, no Ribbons. That alone is reason enough for me to donate. And don’t worry–I’ll take the banner down after Christmas and get back to hating the world.